WFMY News 2's Bridal Beauties - April Hartsook
"Want Different DO Different" Health and Wellness Motivation and Inspiration
October 22, 2013
FEAR - Face Everything And Recover
That dreaded four-letter word that conjures up pain on every level; Mental, Emotional, Physical and Spiritual. Why is that? How many times have you attempted change in your life only to be stopped by that paralyzing notion that in order to change you must drudge up the past and look is square in the face? Immediately fearful thoughts creep into your mind eliciting a response of overwhelming anxiety that triggers "fight or flight".
You "fight" having to face yourself! Do you realize that in order to "Do Different" you must first look at your actions and choices of yesterday? You must acknowledge your role in those actions and choices. You must admit responsibility and accept the truth, before you can seek forgiveness of yourself or look at forgiving others. This is often far too emotional for even the most assured individuals (and "Flight" occurs); thus, over and over you find yourself in the dysfunctional cycle of Fear and Denial that hold a very tight grip on you.... SCARY isn't it?
What is about your fears that stop you from moving forward? Is it the shame and guilt associated with the failures, mistakes and transgressions made yesterday? Is it the acknowledgment of admitting EXACTLY where you are at in life today? (You are not big boned, you hate your job, your relationship/marriage is falling apart, you suffer from depression, and/or addiction, you are overweight, out of shape, in debt, and scared too death)? Is it the possibility that you have to willingly admit you aren't perfect? Or the simple truth that perhaps you think that by this time in your life you should know better, you should have your act together, and you should be able to handle what ever comes at you? Who says?
The truth of the matter is this; so much of life is spent trying to act "as if' you have everything together that inevitably you end up stuffing all of your "today's" and "yesterday's' deep down inside, and sooner or later you are going to run out of room, if you haven't already! The only way to conquer those fears, to face what is in your past and to understand you don't have control of the future is by walking right through that fear!
Personal Growth and Wellness is like walking through a "mind field " (pun intended) and in order to get to through you have to be armed with knowledge, armor, and a plan devised to get you to the other side! Do you know what's on the other side of FEAR? - It's not Faith (all the Faith in the world isn't going to keep the weight off, fix the marriage, create a better job, or provide a paycheck) IT'S LOVE!! Love of yourself in accepting responsibility for your choices, your actions, your thoughts, your behaviors, and your decisions ~
So how do you face your fears?
• Begin by writing down your fears, real or imagined.
• Admit your role in things without looking for a scapegoat or someone else to blame (the condition of your life might not be your fault, but if YOU choose to stay there IT IS)
• Practice forgiving yourself for your mistakes by recognizing you did the best you could with the tools you had at the time
• Understand you are in the Process of acquiring new tools that will help minimize poor choices and mistakes ( keep seeking solutions in others who have the tools you want)
• Seek your own spiritual path discovering serenity and forgiveness knowing you are a work in progress ( and loved exactly the way you are)
• Remove the power your fears have over you by talking about them, sharing with trusted people and those looking to aid in your personal growth
Practice facing your fears with new tools and realizing fear is a natural response to a "PERCEIVED" threat. When you "Want Different" in your life, you must begin by uncovering, unmasking, and providing a name to your fears; thus, the potential for harm is minimized and you can begin to "DO Different!"