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How to save your marriage

Body language expert Blanca Cobb advises on how to save your marriage before divorce.

GREENSBORO, N.C. — January tends to be a busy month for divorce attorneys because many people are considering divorce. Couples tend to keep it together during the holidays, and when the new year rolls in, they call it quits.

Before you throw in the towel, here are suggestions for trying one more time.

Make sure you're not deciding to divorce based on a negative emotional state. Divorce can be a complicated process and an emotional journey. If you make a decision when you're emotional, you might change your mind when you're feeling better and regret your decision.

There are pros and cons to telling your spouse that you're thinking about a divorce. Your spouse might understand, or your spouse might flip out. Divorce is such an emotionally charged word and can feel like a threat. If you're on the fence about a divorce, and you tell your partner what you're thinking, then they might run with it. They might hear that it's over, not that you're thinking about it. Ultimately, it's up to you whether you tell them what you're thinking.

Here are a few ideas on how to give your marriage another try. Share with your spouse what you're feeling and what you want. You can say something like, "I'm feeling a bit disconnected from you. This is what I'm noticing…" And then ask them how they feel and what they notice. Depending on what they say, this might give you information on where to go next and what steps to take that you two feel closer and more connected as a couple. You can do something by yourself: either think of or write a list of everything you love about your partner. It's like a memory lane activity where you're reminding yourself of their impact on your life.

Share your thoughts on my Facebook page: Blanca Cobb – Body Language Expert. Write a message on my timeline, and I'll get back to you. While you're on my page, I'd appreciate it if you give my page a "like."

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