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How To Rebuild Trust When Parents Mess Up Their Kids' Lives

It's one of the biggest scandals in college education history, so how can the parents and kids involved move on?

Investigators say the college admissions scandal is the biggest admissions scam they've ever prosecuted. Thirty-three parents including Hollywood stars Lori Loughlin and Felicity Huffman are among those facing charges. Loughlin and Huffman appeared in federal court earlier this week. In the brief hearings, they waived their rights to a preliminary hearing. Prosecutors say they paid a lot of money to right their kid's test scores or bribed coaches at universities to get their children accepted to the schools. 

The fallout from the scandal can have a major impact on the children involved. There are reports that Lori Loughlin and her daughters have a strained relationship because of it. Anytime parents meddle in their kids' lives, it can cause friction between the parent and child. 

Parents don't intentionally mess up their kids' lives, you can inflict damage when they do. Here are suggestions to handle the fall out. Although you might feel that you had good reasons to do something, your actions have hurt your child. To repair damage, start with an apology. You can say something like, "I'm sorry that I ...." Fill-in-the-blank with your action. Make sure that you accept responsibility without making excuses or giving reasons or justifications.

After the apology, explain your reasons. Help them understand your intentions. You intent was to help, but your actions backfired. Ask your kids how the situation impacted them. And figure out solutions to fix the damage.

For kids who feel betrayed or hurt, many feel like they don't have a voice because they're dependent on their parents. Although this is true, kids have a right to respectfully share their opinions and feelings with their parents.

Share your thoughts on my Facebook page: Blanca Cobb-Body Language Expert. While you're on my page, please give it a "like" and write a message on my timeline. I'll be sure to get back to you. 

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