SEAGROVE, N.C. — Sgt. William Krise picked up the phone on the morning of January 18, 2020, and called his dad. The two men shared a simple conversation like they have done hundreds of times in the past.
“We just talked, nothing big, mostly regular stuff,” said Dan Krise.
The conversation didn’t last long, and Sgt. Krise ended it like he always did.
“He said, I love you, dad."
Dan was in Pennsylvania at the time while his son was at his home in Seagrove, NC. Dan had been planning a trip to North Carolina, but they had yet to set a date.
Later that afternoon, Dan received a phone call from a friend of his son. The lady on the other end of the phone had helped Sgt. Krise find a therapy dog to help him adjust to life after the military. This call was also short, and little was said.
She told Dan his son had committed suicide.
Pain and misery seemed to follow Sgt. Krise from his tour in Iraq back home in the United States. A 10-year veteran, Krise was medically discharged in 2003, but his life was filled with challenges and obstacles after he returned from the war.
“I would say he had more unhappy days than happy days,” said Dan Krise. “He was different when he came back.”
This story is not unique to veterans, especially Army veterans. The suicide rate for the Army peaked in 2012 at 29.9 suicides per 100,000 people - more than twice the national population’s 12.6 suicides per 100,000. The military saw 165 suicides that year, about one every two days.
The latest numbers show about 6,100 veterans commit suicide every year, a little shy of 17 a day.
“I don’t care who you are or what you’ve been through, if you go to war you’re going to come out with PTSD,” said Dan Krise.
His son was diagnosed with PTSD several years ago, and while it was a seemingly constant battle, he was able to hold down a good job and buy a home. What we don’t know is how difficult the battle within was.
“He couldn’t sleep at night, he was having nightmare dreams,” said Dan Krise.
Sgt. Krise was on medication prescribed by doctors at the VA and did go to counseling on occasions. He also became good at hiding the pain and misery. Many knew he was struggling with depression and PTSD, but not to this level.
“He seemed okay when I talked to him on the phone that morning but evidently, he was holding back and already had a plan in mind,” said Dan Krise.
That plan included handwriting 11 letters to family and friends prior to killing himself. Sgt. Krise wrote one of those letters to his father.
“It’s tough to talk about,” said Dan Krise.
The letter starts with an apology for what he would do and encourages his dad to stick with his sobriety and to be present in his grandkids' lives. He encourages his dad to let go of the past and not to blame anyone for what happened. He had special instructions for giving away a few of his valuable possessions including his guns and truck. The letter ended much like his phone calls with the words “Love Bill” at the bottom of the page.
"It’s difficult to talk about him with respect to what happened, but he was loved by everyone,” said Dan Krise.
Family and friends held a celebration of life for Sgt. Krise a few weeks after his passing. Dozens showed up on a cold February day and cooked hamburgers and hot dogs and sat around the campfire telling stories.
“My heart is broken, it was like I lost my heart, Bill was my best friend."
One of those stories that was shared was a December day back in 2018. It was right after the massive snowstorm and Sgt. Krise was watching television and saw a bunch of people in a small Greensboro neighborhood stranded in their homes by the snow. He also thought it was unfair that people were charging $75 or more to plow the driveways.
That day, Sgt. Krise loaded his tractor with a front loader on his trailer and towed it to the community. He spent the day pushing snow off the roads so people could leave to work or doctors’ appointments or get groceries.
He did it, not to get on television, not to make money and not because someone asked. He did it because it was the right thing to do. The military teaches you a lot and one of those traits many veterans keep with them is to “serve” others and help if needed.
Rick Johnson spent 20 years in the Air Force before retiring. He now works with veterans and their families in the Triad.
“When we lose anyone to suicide, regardless if it is a veteran, it is a crisis for that family,” said Johnson.
Johnson works for the Davidson County Veteran Services, the agency has been around for more than 30 years.
“It (veteran suicides) certainly is a concern, to hear a vet has suicidal thought even commit suicide it’s kind of heartbreaking,” said Johnson.
If you know a veteran and think they could use some help in a variety of ways, you can always reach out to the Veterans Crisis Line at 1-800-273-8255 or visit their website at https://www.veteranscrisisline.net/.
Counselors say it's important to recognize the warning signs of suicide:
- Hopeless feeling like there is no way out
- Anxiety, agitation, sleeplessness, mood swings
- Rage or anger
- Engaging in risky activities without thinking
- Increasing alcohol or drug use
- Withdrawing from family and friends
- Talking about death, dying or suicide
Other phone numbers you might want to keep close include: Health Care 1-877-222-8387, Benefits: 1-800-827-1000, White House VA Hotline: 1-855-948-2311.
Dan hopes everyone will remember his son as a man who loved his country, wore his uniform with pride and was always there to lend a hand to others.
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